2009
07.21

Film Review – Downloading Nancy

A Film By Johan Renck

review by lizzy borden

If you want to put your friends and loved ones through hell, take them to see this movie.

The most regrettable aspect of this film is the 2 hours of my life that I wasted by watching it.

I had read that many left the screening at Sundance before it  finished and now I know why.  I envy those people.

To say that there is nothing redeemable about this film is an  understatement.  I did go into this movie with an open mind, despite   the negative press after Sundance.

Nancy, the protagonist, of “Downloading Nancy” is played as well  as anyone could by Maria Bello.  Nancy wants to die.  Nancy is fucked  up (literally and figuratively) by a sadistic uncle from age 7 onwards.  How  do I know this? This is “revealed” in a heavy handed, predictable manner  via scenes with her shrink played by the unmemorable Amy Brenneman.   Nancy has a boorish, golf addicted husband whose character’s name I  forget, portrayed by Rufus Sewell.  His interesting  face gives false hope of an interesting character.  It’s not his fault.  You’re only as good as your material, and to bring this character alive  would be to make a Persian Rug out of lint balls.   Nancy is in an unhappy  marriage, Nancy mutilates/cuts herself , Nancy masturbates at her  computer.  Nancy hooks up with “Louis” , the bloated Jason Patrick, on the  internet and leaves her husband to meet him in a bleak, nowheresville  town.

Which brings me to the setting, the ridiculous art direction compounds the  flimsy writing and 1 dimensional characters.  I mean really, does a  white  couple in their 30’s really have plastic coverings on their sofa?   Someone  wanted so badly to sneak in kitch via the plastic covered floral sofa, 70’s  dated furniture and art.  What also confounded me, was that everyone who  entered  the house has to remove their shoes.  I thought for a moment that  this was symbolic plot line that would lead somewhere,  but no, it was just  stupid.

Ok, so what happens between Nancy and her internet love interest,  Louis???  Ya know, you don’t really care.  You don’t care about Nancy,,you  don’t care about Louis and you don’t care about the nameless husband.  At this point in the film, you’re wondering if you left your coffee maker on  or forgot to lock the front door.

Nancy and Louis play the blindfold game with mousetraps.  Much less  interesting  on the screen than it sounds here.

I won’t tell you the ending.  I will just relate my relief and joy when it  finally ended. Upon returning home, I immediately took a shower and  stretched out on my uncovered sofa.

The soundtrack, a Radio Head rip off, and the photography, a  50 ISO  blue bath, complimented well the obtuse, pointlessness of this pointless  film.  I give it zero pentagrams.

L. Borden

Rating: ☆☆☆☆☆

(wow.  0/0 pentagrams.  an AskSatanAnything.com first.  lizzy actually rated this film -10 Pentagrams, but our software can’t handle that request.)


Want to see this shitty movie?  Click it:


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